Understanding Postpartum Depression

Postpartum depression is one of those things that that feels like it can only happen to someone else, until it happens to you.

Imagine yourself being caught in a rainstorm. All of a sudden, that skies part and the sun is shining and for a brief moment, it looks as though the worst is over.

Then it starts raining again, only this time it's coming sideways and so hard that it causes you to lose your balance and you fall....but never seem to stop falling.

The sun shines again, soon followed by the rain, a little thunder, maybe some hail and a great deal of wind.

Rinse
Repeat

Postpartum depression is a vicious cycle of feeling like things are great, then feeling like your entire world is crumbling and you aren't sure why. You don't recognize yourself. You doubt yourself. You wonder if your children would be better off with someone else.

There are moments of hope and moments of despair. Moments of happy and moments of sad.

All of these moments, packed into a hormonally charged postpartum transition that can take years to navigate.

Until it happens, it feels like a far fetched idea that has a huge stigma of being wrong or bad. Until it happens, it seems like that thing that can't possibly happen to you because you've got your shit together.

Until it happens.

And it happens. And you fall. And you don't know how you're ever going to get up.

But you do.

And the sun shines and there comes a day where you feel like that storm is never going to come again because you're just not going to let it.

Postpartum depression is scary and it's real. It presents itself in so many different forms from panic attacks to anxiety, from paranoia to rage. From isolation to extreme euphoria and even psychosis.

If you're feeling that things just aren't quite right and you can't recognize yourself or you feel that storm keeps coming, there is help. Lean on your supports and know that there people out there that want to see you dominate and be an incredible parent.

It doesn't define you and it doesn't own you.

That storm will end and the sun will shine.

xoxo
Shannon

Creating a Self Care Plan

So, you've had your baby and are settled at home. Visitors have come and gone, meals have been dropped off and your freezer stocked up.

It's been a couple of weeks and you're going stir crazy.

Creating (and sticking to) a self care plan can remind you that you are more than just a mom, more than just a boob. It can help you get back to who you were pre-pregnancy, and give you a space to breathe.

Use the chart below to schedule your self care time, and consider the following:

What did you love to do before you were pregnant?
Are there certain places that you enjoyed going?
When was the last time you took yourself out for lunch?
Do you enjoy going to the spa for a massage or pedicure?
Who can you rely on for childcare to ensure that you have one day/evening a week for self care?

Need an accountability partner? Shoot me a message! I will gladly help you and make sure you are taking some time out to take care of your soul!

How PPD and a Traumatic Birth Changed Me #pregnancy

So, to this point I've kept things pretty light and airy around here, with a focus on the professional side of things. However, I think it's time to open up about past experiences that have shaped who I am, particularly who I am as a mom.

When I was pregnant with my first, I had a pretty tough time. I threw up alot (lost 21lbs in my first trimester), then had 42 days of back labour before our little guy came into the world. When he did make his arrival, he was born in distress, with the cord wrapped around his neck.

I found out a couple of days after he was born that we almost lost him, and my poor husband had to watch the pediatrics team work on our son to revive him.

Not exactly an ideal pregnancy or birth experience. In fact, it was actually really traumatic and was a big reason that I ended up with Postpartum Depression.

I've always said that the experiences along our path shape who we are, and I firmly believe that PPD and Owen's traumatic birth has shaped who I am as a mom, as a woman. Since then, I have found my voice, found my passion and urge other moms to do the same.

As we enter third trimester with our new little guy, I am filled with so many mixed emotions. I'm scared of getting PPD again, I'm scared of a traumatic birth. I'm hopeful for a positive outcome all around, and know that I am more in control of things than I was last time.

To the little guy who made me a mom for the very first time, thank you. Thank you for teaching me just how strong I am, for not judging me when I didn't (and still don't) know what I was doing and for learning and growing with me every step of the way.

What does all of this have to do with me as a business owner? Well...it's about being authentic and sharing my journey with you. It's about being real, and taking the time to process all that happened just four short years ago, when we are of the eve of doing it all over again; this time more informed and empowered than before.

My voice is strong and for once, I feel in control of things. This pregnancy has been pretty great. I have stayed active, am the healthiest that I ever have been in my entire life, and have tried my darnedest to set us up for a happy, healthy and safe birth experience. I know that there are things that are not within my control, and that ultimately we just have to roll with things as they come, but knowing that and accepting that is part of what has shaped this pregnancy to be a positive one.

This is something that I will continue to write about and open up about. We have made some incredible decisions with this pregnancy, including hiring our amazing Doula, Jena, and I want to share those experiences with you.

Until then...embrace the experiences along your path, however hard they may be. Process them, be grateful for them, and learn from them.