Prenatal Mental Health Check-In

So it's December....which means shorter hours of sunshine, cloudy days, snow and cold (at least here in Ontario).

Mental health in general during the winter is a challenge thing. The environmental factors that impact mental health are at a massive low in the winter months; when the days are dreary, we feel that in our bodies and minds.

Now is a great time to check in with your mental health status during pregnancy before the stress of the holidays hit.

How are you feeling?

Be honest here. Let down your guard and be honest. It's ok to say that you're not enjoying every moment of pregnancy. It's ok they be absolutely euphoric about pregnancy and you upcoming birth.

No matter how you are feeling.....

it. is. ok.

Take a few minutes to find your breath today. If you're feeling stressed or overwhelmed, anticipating a stressful holiday season. Or if you're quickly approaching birth and time seems to be flying by you.

After you've found you breath and have felt your heart slow, start planning out some self care activities to carry you through the most stressful time of year. Pregnancy itself is stressful, add in the holidays and family dynamics, potential for judgement and it's easy to see how your mental health can become compromised and difficult to manage.

However you are feeling, today and in the coming weeks, it is ok.

Acknowledge it and find your breath. Find a way to slow the pace of your heart. Check in with yourself every so often throughout your pregnancy, especially during the winter, and be honest.

xoxo
Shannon

Understanding Postpartum Depression

Postpartum depression is one of those things that that feels like it can only happen to someone else, until it happens to you.

Imagine yourself being caught in a rainstorm. All of a sudden, that skies part and the sun is shining and for a brief moment, it looks as though the worst is over.

Then it starts raining again, only this time it's coming sideways and so hard that it causes you to lose your balance and you fall....but never seem to stop falling.

The sun shines again, soon followed by the rain, a little thunder, maybe some hail and a great deal of wind.

Rinse
Repeat

Postpartum depression is a vicious cycle of feeling like things are great, then feeling like your entire world is crumbling and you aren't sure why. You don't recognize yourself. You doubt yourself. You wonder if your children would be better off with someone else.

There are moments of hope and moments of despair. Moments of happy and moments of sad.

All of these moments, packed into a hormonally charged postpartum transition that can take years to navigate.

Until it happens, it feels like a far fetched idea that has a huge stigma of being wrong or bad. Until it happens, it seems like that thing that can't possibly happen to you because you've got your shit together.

Until it happens.

And it happens. And you fall. And you don't know how you're ever going to get up.

But you do.

And the sun shines and there comes a day where you feel like that storm is never going to come again because you're just not going to let it.

Postpartum depression is scary and it's real. It presents itself in so many different forms from panic attacks to anxiety, from paranoia to rage. From isolation to extreme euphoria and even psychosis.

If you're feeling that things just aren't quite right and you can't recognize yourself or you feel that storm keeps coming, there is help. Lean on your supports and know that there people out there that want to see you dominate and be an incredible parent.

It doesn't define you and it doesn't own you.

That storm will end and the sun will shine.

xoxo
Shannon

Learn to Meditate #meditation #mentalhealth

I've written about Meditation Oasis before here on the blog, but wanted to give a seasonal reminder that mental health is important. Taking time to meditate every day, especially when you are stressed or feel overwhelmed, but I often get asked how do you meditate?

Source

While you will find what works for you, here is what I do.

When I get ready for bed, I turn off all noise. No TV, white sound machine, fan...nothing. Open the window for some fresh air, and turn the lights off.

Then, I snuggle down in bed and put my sleep mask on. I find that it almost give me a layer of protection from the outside light and noise when I am meditating. Once I am comfortable, and covered with warm blankets (I find that meditating makes my body feel cold), I put my earbuds in and close my eyes.

Why ear buds? Why night time?

Well, ear buds because it helps me focus. I'm ok with thoughts swirling in my head, but not ok with outside noise which I find really distracting. Again, it's like a physical barrier between me and the outside.

Night time because, in all honesty, this is the only time that I have 100% to myself. In those 8-25minutes of a meditation, it is completely my time. I also find that meditating at night allows me to sleep more soundly, and lets my brain regroup overnight, making for a more productive and positive day upon waking up.

My number one tip on how to meditate would have to be to do it when you are able to be completely alone. Small children often don't understand that it's a time for quiet, and I find that there are more distractions during the daytime. Even something as simple as sunshine can be a distraction to your meditative process!

Try it! You just might like it!

New Year New Me...Mental Clutter

One of the most challenging aspects of undergoing a drastic lifestyle change is the mental clutter, and overcoming self doubt.

For me personally, I have always struggled with my weight. In elementary and highschool, I was constantly teased, given horrible nicknames and felt awful about myself.

Then, I met my future-husband in University. We dated, we got married, we got comfortable. Then we got pregnant, and at the beginning of my pregnancy in 2009 I was 205lbs.

205.

Two hundred and five.

One pregnancy, two personal trainers, one round of Insanity later, I am 157lbs.

When I look in the mirror, more often than not, I still see that 205lbs woman. I see the double chin, not the cheekbones. I see the love handles, not the tiny waist.

So, how do you overcome the mental clutter and slefdoubt so as to not sabotage yourself?

I meditate, and I try to daily. It helps quiet the little voice inside that seems to creep up right at bedtime, and helps me focus on what's important.

If you want to try meditation, one app that I would recommend is Relax Lite.

It runs for about 20mins after the initial instructions, and starts by closing the doors on fear and doubt. What a fantastic thing to visualize! I actually picture myself closing and locking two doors, and I feel the self doubt quiet right down.

After 20mins, I feel...centred. I feel more determined, and more focused on my goals.

How do you deal with self doubt when undergoing such a drastic lifestyle change?

Mama's Time Out: Bowling?

Our outing for this month's Mama's Time Out was to go bowling...

Oh the best laid plans...haha how they never pan out properly! We had made plans to go out for a night of bowling and appetizers - some Mama's are pregnant, some mama's are nursing...other mama's have to work in the morning, and others get to sleep in.

Unfortunately a lot of the kiddos (mine included) took sick and only 3 of us were able to venture out. By the time we got there, the lanes were full for a few hours. Pretty disappointing...so we headed to the bar for appetizers and some drinks.

Usually our talks revolve heavily around our kids....who's sleeping and who's not...who's sick...developmental milestones.

This chat took a bit of a turn...I started talking about mortality issues. Do you mama's have them? I know it's a bit heavy to think about, but once you lose a parent, and then become a parent...it weighs on you. Or at least, it weighs on me.

So, MNO this month wasn't thrilling and exciting and relaxing. We all had things that were weighing on us between sick babies and toddlers, my mortality issues...

Being a mom never stops - whether you work at home, stay at home, or work outside of the home. You're a mom...24 hours a day, 7 days a week, and 365 days a year...sometimes even 366 days a year.

MNO should be fun next month...we're doing a pamper afternoon with my BlogHer sponsor, Michele from Mary Kay!